Sick of Love
There's a scene in Sandman 's Kindly Ones story where Rose Walker says how much she hates love. She talks about how it robs you of dignity, autonomy, how it takes hostages and makes you vulnerable. It hollows you out and makes you into someone new, because you fall under someone else's influence even if you never wanted to be. It snatches you away from your own life and integrates you into someone else's. Love, in other words, is a parasite. I wish I hated love just because of that. I mean, I get it. The obsession at the start of a relationship where all you can do is think about the person is so frustrating. It's not a peaceful, happy, thing. Rather it makes me anxious and unsettled to have those thoughts, to be continually thinking about the other person. Perhaps that makes me selfish - a recurring theme with my internal monologue - but I don't want to be so focused on someone else I lose myself, and that's what it feels like to me. That infatuation - t